Her past time is giving the men in her life grief. But yes, she knows it, she's not happy about it and hates herself for it even if it's another variation of herself.

I only know vaguely of Fate's Merlin but if it means like... anything? The Myrddin that raised her was unfortunately emotionally neglectful, raised her in social isolation and sees her as a political tool. So definitely not the best father figure, especially raising her to subdue feelings.

Which is why Gwenhwyfar doesn't really comprehend her own feelings.

And also why she'll still hope Merlin will help her with everything ever.

HAHAHA YEAH. I, myself, am for Arthur being tailed by two white-haired weirdoes. Just ignore Gwen's insecurities.